Shadydentist’s X-Treme Paragraph of Death (II): Responses

quantumman

Quantum Mechanics

You all should learn this enlightening subject. Where else can you prove that the work that you left at home ceased to exist because you stopped observing it. Also, you can confuse people with meaning less sayings that will make them submit to your will. With quantum mechanics you can do all this and more. So what are you waiting for start learning the greatest of all obsessions today!

rouge

Emo is a great way to feel cool about being weird and dorky. Why, you don't even need to get a decent haircut! You can cut your own hair and still be stylish. You can dress like a geek, read books, write poetry, and not listen to classical music all while being cool in your eyes. Not only can you wear old stuff from the 80s, but you can also wear your grandparents' clothing! Wouldn't that be swell? When you're depressed, you'll always have music that will make you happy, even though it's depressing. You can feel good that you're unpopular and possibly have no friends because that means you're really emo. You no longer have to eat, exercise, or get a tan because it's very emo to be incredibly pale and skinny with no muscular tone. Now even wearing glasses is cool: just wear those thick, black glasses and you'll be quite trendy. So in conclusion, emo is not only fun but a good way to be cool even if you're a geek.

TheGraySheep

A/N:I totally disregarded the limit and don't expect to win.

Hermione is the antithesis to the pureblood elitist propoganda that Lucius has been drilling into Draco’s head since he could walk and point a wand. “You should be ashamed that you let a Mudblood beat you in every class…” (CoS) nonetheless, Draco manages to give Hermione good competition. In OotP, Hermione looks over at Draco’s paper to compare grades and it is Hermione who can understand the clockwork of Draco‘s mind when Ron and Harry are set-up in first year.

In PoA, she slaps Draco and he surprisingly, does not retaliate. She, on the other hand, misses Charms, confessing, “Oh, it was Malfoy, I was thinking about him and I lost track of things!” and even says, "You think he'll be all right?" when Malfoy gets attacked by a hippogriff later on. As GoF can show, they have an unexplainable amount of care for whether the other gets killed or not, "Granger, they're after Muggles. D'you want to be showing off your knickers in mid-air? [...]Keep that big, busy head down, Granger," sneered Malfoy- warning Hermione about the dangers of Death Eaters at the World Cup. During a memorable incident when Professor Moody transfigures Malfoy into a ferret, it is Hermione who says, "He could have really hurt Malfoy, though. It was good, really, that McGonagall stopped it," to a dumbstruck Ron and Harry. However, it is not only Ron and Harry that Hermione renders speechless; at the Yule Ball, “Even he [Malfoy] didn’t seem to be able to find an insult to throw at her.” so stupefied was he of her beauty.

OotP, despite its ostensibly Ron and Hermione parts, has some notable points. The Black family tapestry, adorned with golden dark wizards has every member erased for marrying into a mublood family, or has every member killed* except for the Malfoys. If Draco were to marry a mudblood, it would signify the end of the Toujours Pur (Always Pure) and would serve to underscore the revolution of new, Mudblood-embracing ideals in contrast to the Voldemort War. First he needs to find a Mudblood who can humble him and whom he respects to break apart his skewed ideals. A relationship could continue to prosper as J.K has conveniently placed both as Prefects. And whom will become Head Boy and Head Girl? Perhaps the two best students in Hogwarts from the two most competitive Houses? In previous books, it had always been down to Slytherin and Gryffindor in Inter-House Competitions.

Furthermore, we take Ron and Hermione as a canon inevitability, but Ron seems hesitant to share his feelings. In fact, the only time we see him get close is after the Yule Ball. Therefore to make Ron act, he needs a rival; preferably a rival closer to home that cannot be dismissed as a ‘pen pal’. It is a simple fact, that Hermione and Ron are childish with one another and Hermione does not respect him as an intellectual peer. Hermione needs a relationship, particularly a tempestuous one, to allow her to truly appreciate Ron in contrast to Draco before she can settle down to marital bliss with a penitent Ron and her more understanding and yielding self. Without another relationship, Hermione would have lived and loved once, marrying someone her inexperienced self cannot deal with.

J.K Rowling likes to surprise us and keep us on our toes. Do you think that she will ever do as expected? She has cultivated the characters Draco and Hermione since the first book, given them every physical and emotional barrier, but a true romantic like J.K could have done this with the intention of pairing them together in the end. She mentioned in a chat that a relationship would be important to the plot development- what better than a relationship which epitomizes the themes she puts in her books?… love conquers all (Lily’s love protects Harry), people who hate each other can fall in love (Lily and James), you do not have to grow up like your parents (Sirius and his family, and perhaps Draco and his), your House doesn’t determine your personality (Zacariah was a mean Hufflepuff), people can do unexpected, out of character things (Marietta was the traitor), and most importantly Dumbledore’s favorite phrase ‘inter-House relationships’, which Hermione, for one, seems keen to pursue.

*Except Bellatrix and her husband

WINNER: (none)